Hey everyone! Welcome back to our weekly solo check-in from the high seas, where I (Jason!) break down the latest wave of chaos aboard Bravo’s Below Deck Down Under. We’re on Season 3, Episode 15! We are coming to a quick end to a very successful season!
Let’s Reacp!
🌊 The Calm Before the Smooch
With charter guests arriving the next morning, the crew finally scores a rare night off. Where do our boatmances sit?
• Harry and Bri are still giving cute couple energy.
• Nate and Alesia? Heating up fast.
• Marina and Nic are low-key becoming the MVPs of the season.
But of course, Lara watches it all from the sidelines judging, side-eyeing, and giving passive-agressive vibes. Not Fun.
💋 “Smoochie” Heard Round the Boat
Nate and Alesia share a sweet moment, until he calls their kiss a “smoochie.” Yes, that word. Alesia responds the only way a Bravoleb can: by saying her “vagina folded back into itself“. That might go down as one of the most unintentionally hilarious Below Deck quotes ever.
Meanwhile, Marina drops a cute love note for Nic, telling him he brightens her day. He tucks it into his phone case like a teenage rom-com and yes, my heart melted a little. It was very cute.
🔪 Galley of Doom: Lara vs. Tzarina
The drama triangle is back with Lara and Tzarina going at it….again. Lara wants an apology. Tzarina wants accountability. So what’s the solution? They agree to only speak when “absolutely necessary.” It’s giving high school vibes on a multi-million dollar yacht.
Then comes the power move: Lara promotes Marina to second stew…. without telling Captain Jason. BIG mistake. Jason hears about it from the crew and let’s just say, the man is not amused.
⛴️ Yachting 101: Promotions like that typically go through the captain. Lara skipping protocol isn’t just bad leadership—it’s straight-up Bravo fuel.
To make things worse, Lara tries to play the victim, asking Marina if she thinks Jason doesn’t like her.
🛥️ Crew Mess Meltdown (Again)
Yes, we’re still fighting over wiping tables. In fact, I wanted to jump through the TV with a Clorox wipe last night! Lara asks Alesia to clean. Alesia refuses. Jason calls it what it is—a department head power struggle. Tzarina? She tells Alesia to go swimming instead. Iconic? Yes. Professional? Not really.
Tzarina later lands one of the best confessionals of the season:
“Lara’s not a perfectionist. She’s a perfectional bitch.”
Can we get that on a Bravo t-shirt, please? But, seriously.
❤️🩹 Redemption + Romantic Roadblocks
Marina is finally being seen for the asset she is, after spending half the season buried in laundry. Tzarina calls her a “real” second stew. And honestly? She’s not wrong.
On the romance front, Nate is head-over-heels for Alesia, planning sunset dates and clinging pretty hard. But the “smoochie” incident has left her traumatized. Meanwhile, Harry and Bri are debating post-season travel—but Bri is firmly Team Room Service, not Team Hostel. Can’t blame her.
💥 Enter Guests, Exit Peace
Charter guests arrive and things go… surprisingly smooth? But not for long. Lara brings up crew mess drama (again), and Jason finally calls it out: it’s a power struggle, not a cleaning issue!
That night’s tropical dinner is a success despite the storm. But Jason overhears Tzarina calling Marina “second stew” and confronts Lara. She insists they totally talked about it. Jason doesn’t remember, and honestly? I believe Jason.
🪩 Disco Ball Drama
At the tip meeting, Jason awards the disco ball helmet to Lara. Usually a funny joke, not a punishment—Harry’s gotten it, many times. But Lara? She takes it as a personal attack. Tears, sulking…you name it.
Let’s rewind: This is the same captain who chased after her to lift her up after she disrespected him in a meeting. Lara, it’s not that no one appreciates you—it’s that you make it really hard to be on your team.
🎬 Final Thoughts
This crew? Talented. This season? Wild. The problem isn’t ability—it’s unity. The most iconic seasons of Below Deck balance drama with teamwork. Right now, we’ve got drama on steroids, but not enough cohesion to make it click.
Still, a messy boat is a watchable boat—and Below Deck Down Under continues to deliver Bravo gold.
Catch us live every Tuesday night at 10:30 PM ET beginning June 3rd on YouTube for Anchor Watch and don’t forget—OG Below Deck is back June 2nd with Captain Kerry and Chief Stew Fraser.
🎧 If you’d rather listen to my recap, check it out on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.
See you next week!
— Jason
Images and videos are used for editorial and commentary purposes under fair use guidelines. All rights to promotional materials belong to Bravo Media/NBCUniversal.
